- You do not need another person to help you feel complete: your happiness should always be your priority in life and you can achieve this on your own. You not want to make someone everything that matters in life, because love isn’t always infinite. Do not leave yourself with nothing.
- Nothing matters as much as you think it does: a motto I love to live my life by is, ‘nothing ever seems too bad after a cup of tea’. Just take the time to take yourself out of a situation, relax and allow yourself a break or to think rationally.
- People will break your hearts: being 19 I went through my own heartbreak and it is something everyone will go through - it’s the worst experience; especially when you loved that person a whole lot. But nothing in life is for sure and in the wise words of Alex Russo’s Mam in ‘Wizards of a Waverly Place’, ‘you’re just one heart break closer to finding the one’.
- As you grow older, actions will have more emotional consequences and what matters most during these moments is putting yourself first: when you’re younger, you do not really consider the consequences of your actions or someone else’s too much as we’re too busy just living and focusing on the next silly to do. As you get older you start to understand that you’re needs change and the reasons for your actions are different, thus the consequences will be direr. If you are putting yourself and your happiness at the forefront of everything you do – keep living life to the fullest.
- Keeping important long-distance friendships alive is difficult: I have grown apart from a lot of close friends since turning 19 and I wish that I knew this was going to be the case, so I could have worked harder to keep those friendships alive. But it is so easy to send a message here and there just to let you know you still love them and care.
- You will still be reliant on your family, no matter your age: I am so wholly reliant on my family. On everything from support and advice or for a simple picture of my cat of whom I miss dearly. Do not be ashamed of needed your family there, this is what they are here for.
- Money is fucking important (don't spend it all on dominoes pizza): no matter what age you are, it is so important to learn about budgeting and saving. You will not regret the time you spend learning these simple things because last year I blew my student loan in seconds and living life through overdrafts or working constantly over holidays despite deadlines is just not easy.
- Not everybody will like you, despite just how much you can justify the misjudgements: I have always struggled with this myself, I could never get over why someone would dislike me for something I felt like wasn’t my fault, or I didn’t do. But we need to learn that some people are stubborn, and their minds will not change. Moreover, you do not get to decide whether or not you have hurt someone in this world.
Dear 21-year-old Gee,
- I hope you have got over the fact that people disliking you for reasons beyond your control does not define who you are as a person. Life can only be lived in a limited number of days, do not waste it fretting over people who simply do not matter.
- I hope you managed to stay a vegan, so far it has been 2 months and it has been easy and very benefiting. If you didn’t manage, don’t worry – try again, remember how good your nails were!
- I hope you did at least two different work experience jobs over the summer because this summer you slept every single day and watched tv, completely unproductive.
- I hope you got a good overall grade for year 2! I was aiming for a first, but do not worry if you didn’t because data journalism is fucking hard. Knuckle down this year though, don’t just read the ‘abstract’ of articles, read the WHOLE thing.
- I hope you kept your long-distance friendships in control and didn’t get lost in your work, if you haven’t – it’s not too late to send that ‘I love you message.’
- I hope you have messaged Mum to ask about the cat today – and any other pets she may have gathered in since I was 19.
- I hope you have become more content with being alone and the idea that this could be for a long time, it’s perfectly okay to find yourself and not to feel like you’re constantly waiting around for someone. If you have found someone – I hope you’re happy 😊
- I hope you have been going to the gym more, you’ve been 5 times this month and it’s simply not good enough. I want you to look down when you’re reading this and see a 6 pack. That would be the dream.
- I hope you’ve got another tattoo, I have been planning for ages to get another one, but I have simply been too lazy and too broke to sort it out. I hope it’s cute, minimalistic and means something personal to us!
- I hope your head is a little clearer and you can breathe easy. I know life really sucks at times, but we’re only getting older with less time to truly enjoy it.
- Most of all, I honestly, truly, hope you’re happy and living life to the fullest. Good luck with third year from 19-year-old you and enjoy your 21st birthday.
And that is it. Another year has come and go in the life of Gee. I am no closer to figuring out exactly who it is that I am or who I want to be, but I am learning a hell of a lot so that must stand for something. As it gets closer to the 3rd of November, I am excited and nervous. Nervous as my teenage years will be officially over and I still remember being 11 and my parents saying “in two years you’ll be a moody teenager! In 6 years you’ll be able to drive!” Now I am going to be considered an adult with a driving license, if I feel time has gone fast, I wonder how my parents must feel. But most of all, I am excited. Life is opening bigger and better opportunities for me to grow and become a happy, healthy and slightly odd human being with truly big aspirations. Thank you to all my friends and family that stuck with my through my rocky, abnormal, educational 19th year.
Here’s to another year of Understanding Me, good luck.
Go nuts guys.