I’ve been a mission. One that helps me reshape my life in a healthy and positive way, with the end result being that I can truly be happy with my whole heart. This journey of self-discovery has been one I’ve been venturing on since the day I could really understand that I am living human being, capable of changing this world. Except, I’ve recently found myself stuck in a crater, one not even 007 could help me out of on this mission. Though calling out an s.o.s unfortunately will not help in this situation, as the only person who can save me now is myself. Oh, the beauty of irony.
I take life and the things within it way too seriously. It’s not something I can even control from happening, one minute I am struggling with an essay and the next I am questioning whether my whole future is going to shambles because I’m not a good writer?! One minute I am struggling with my finances and the next I am going to starve to death because I’ll run out of money and cans of beans?! One minute a guy messages me and asks about my day and the next I’m planning our entire wedding and figuring out the best way to tell our friends?! It’s absolutely absurd how quickly my mind jumps to conclusions, some of which really destroy my self-esteem or result in me lying in bed for hours unable to move because I’m a disappointment on legs. I’ve finally come to a brand new conclusion, one that will hopefully help me from thinking the world is falling apart because my laptop wouldn’t connect to the University Wifi.
On the inner corner of my left ankle I have a tattoo of a coffee cup. It’s there to remind me that sometimes I need to take a step back from everything and anything in life. Make yourself a nice cuppa, cuddle up in your best Christmas pyjamas and take yourself away from this world. We all need time to be able to breathe and forget about the stresses and struggles that come with everyday life. This gave me time to realise that I need to learn to be more light-hearted. If I persistently take everything to heart, all of my feelings and emotions will just keep building up until eventually I burst and everything that had upset me will just splatter everywhere and nothing will be left but a very broken and empty girl. If we learn to not take things to heart and not take things too seriously, life would be a lot simpler. I could begin to focus on things that truly matter, like my degree and my friendships. I could invest more time into finding the things that make me happy and will help me with my journey of self-discovery. To finally be happy, I need to learn to stop carrying around such a heavy heart.
But how do I become more light-hearted? How do I stop caring what people think and how do I stop reading into people’s actions like I am a psycho ex-girlfriend? Well, it’ll be different for everyone, but ideally we need a nice, fresh start. Think of it as if you’re opening up your head, dusting away all the cobwebs, emptying out all the drawers full unimportant shit, bleaching away all the horrible memories, cleaning all the good things that make us happy and finally, hoovering up all the heavy heartiness we’ve got sprawled across the floor. With a nice fresh clean out we can finally start to feel this sense of relief and begin to fill up our lives with things that are healthy and positive and are going to benefit ourselves and our happiness.
So personally, I am going to start going to the gym more and actually attend my dance classes, so I can physically feel good and enjoy one of my longest hobbies. I am going to focus a lot more on my essay writing, despite how stressful they are, so I can practise and learn and get better. I am going to keep writing in my diary, so I can have a way of releasing all and any negative energy and feelings and then lock it away to laugh about some day. I am going to go out with my friends and not worry about what people think of us, I want to have great times and form many more crazy, amazing memories. I am going to continue to help people, because this is the one thing I love doing the most. So now you need to ask yourself what you are going to do to start to refill your brand new fresh mind, making sure you are keeping your happiness at the forefront of it all.
“We are all broken, that’s how the light gets in” Remember, it is alright to have a heavy heart sometimes. No one is expected to fight off and defeat every bad thing that comes into our lives. Unfortunately, we aren’t super humans. But we shouldn’t have to carry these heavy hearts around with us all the time, as we’ll be exhausted and emotionally drained and again, end up like a burrito of sadness in bed, crying over things that are a complete waste of time. So join me in trying to be more light-hearted and not taking things so seriously. My essay writing will always improve, I am a student of course my finances are going to be bad and finding love isn’t a priority right now. I am just focusing on being Gee and being a happy Gee.
Unburden yourselves, step back, breathe, drink a nice cuppa and start again.
Go nuts guys.
I take life and the things within it way too seriously. It’s not something I can even control from happening, one minute I am struggling with an essay and the next I am questioning whether my whole future is going to shambles because I’m not a good writer?! One minute I am struggling with my finances and the next I am going to starve to death because I’ll run out of money and cans of beans?! One minute a guy messages me and asks about my day and the next I’m planning our entire wedding and figuring out the best way to tell our friends?! It’s absolutely absurd how quickly my mind jumps to conclusions, some of which really destroy my self-esteem or result in me lying in bed for hours unable to move because I’m a disappointment on legs. I’ve finally come to a brand new conclusion, one that will hopefully help me from thinking the world is falling apart because my laptop wouldn’t connect to the University Wifi.
On the inner corner of my left ankle I have a tattoo of a coffee cup. It’s there to remind me that sometimes I need to take a step back from everything and anything in life. Make yourself a nice cuppa, cuddle up in your best Christmas pyjamas and take yourself away from this world. We all need time to be able to breathe and forget about the stresses and struggles that come with everyday life. This gave me time to realise that I need to learn to be more light-hearted. If I persistently take everything to heart, all of my feelings and emotions will just keep building up until eventually I burst and everything that had upset me will just splatter everywhere and nothing will be left but a very broken and empty girl. If we learn to not take things to heart and not take things too seriously, life would be a lot simpler. I could begin to focus on things that truly matter, like my degree and my friendships. I could invest more time into finding the things that make me happy and will help me with my journey of self-discovery. To finally be happy, I need to learn to stop carrying around such a heavy heart.
But how do I become more light-hearted? How do I stop caring what people think and how do I stop reading into people’s actions like I am a psycho ex-girlfriend? Well, it’ll be different for everyone, but ideally we need a nice, fresh start. Think of it as if you’re opening up your head, dusting away all the cobwebs, emptying out all the drawers full unimportant shit, bleaching away all the horrible memories, cleaning all the good things that make us happy and finally, hoovering up all the heavy heartiness we’ve got sprawled across the floor. With a nice fresh clean out we can finally start to feel this sense of relief and begin to fill up our lives with things that are healthy and positive and are going to benefit ourselves and our happiness.
So personally, I am going to start going to the gym more and actually attend my dance classes, so I can physically feel good and enjoy one of my longest hobbies. I am going to focus a lot more on my essay writing, despite how stressful they are, so I can practise and learn and get better. I am going to keep writing in my diary, so I can have a way of releasing all and any negative energy and feelings and then lock it away to laugh about some day. I am going to go out with my friends and not worry about what people think of us, I want to have great times and form many more crazy, amazing memories. I am going to continue to help people, because this is the one thing I love doing the most. So now you need to ask yourself what you are going to do to start to refill your brand new fresh mind, making sure you are keeping your happiness at the forefront of it all.
“We are all broken, that’s how the light gets in” Remember, it is alright to have a heavy heart sometimes. No one is expected to fight off and defeat every bad thing that comes into our lives. Unfortunately, we aren’t super humans. But we shouldn’t have to carry these heavy hearts around with us all the time, as we’ll be exhausted and emotionally drained and again, end up like a burrito of sadness in bed, crying over things that are a complete waste of time. So join me in trying to be more light-hearted and not taking things so seriously. My essay writing will always improve, I am a student of course my finances are going to be bad and finding love isn’t a priority right now. I am just focusing on being Gee and being a happy Gee.
Unburden yourselves, step back, breathe, drink a nice cuppa and start again.
Go nuts guys.