We're human beings, and we get things wrong. This is an inevitable trait every single person you meet will possess, it's not something we can ever escape. So why do we find ourselves lamenting over the death of the perfect selves within us we think exist? Why do we find other people shaming us for our mistake that from the start was stitched into our genes, something that was always bound to happen? Mistakes aren't something we can predict and therefore prevent in order to satisfy our own whims. Unfortunately, we have to live with the idea that sometimes fate just has something a little bit different wrote down for us. And sometimes that can be the unintentional causation of hurting someone else. But in the end, there should be no winners or losers. Whatever you decide to do. Make sure it makes you happy.
In the past, there have been people who I have dearly loved and I would have liked to have believed they dearly loved me. But we weren't good for each other. And that doesn't necessarily mean they were a bad person or they didn't treat me in a way I felt I deserved, it just meant that they way they lived and existed within the world forced me to compromise the way I lived and existed in my world. As Daniell Koepke states, “as much as you care, you can't destroy yourself for the sake of someone else. You have to make your well-being a priority” And despite how selfish this may sound, it's actually a really important concept to be taking up and being able to apply within your life. Happiness doesn't start with what you find in someone else, it starts with how you feel inside. Now, being with someone who is challenging the way you live in life because you have to keep making these sacrifices and perhaps are constantly manipulating the way you view and live life because of their needs, isn't a healthy relationship to be in. Now, I am someone who strongly believes that you shouldn't just give up because the situation isn't great or because you haven't been able to try every element in order to fix this small hiccup, but I understand how it feels to be trapped in a love that you don't feel is driving you within life anymore. It can be extremely hard to reach a point in your life and in this potential relationship, where you feel comfortable and strong enough to be able to admit and then take action on the way you feel. Because letting go is extremely hard, but this isn't giving up or you not being in love, it's just you realising that your happiness is important and needs to be driven and kept alive by something else. Simply being just that. We're human beings...and we get these things wrong.
“Understand that people change and sometimes they're no longer compatible with our lives. We just have to learn to accept it and move on.” It's really funny actually, because sometimes we meet these amazing people who make you feel invincible and have you falling in love through the heat of the fire – and we think...this is it. This is where I am going to fall and be caught and live the rest of my life getting high off their thoughts, their love for me, my love for them. And day after day you seem to be falling further and further and nothing ever feels like it could ever be better than those everlasting moments. Then one early morning, before we ever really realise what has happened, we're laying crashed on the ground because no did ever catch us after all the time. And what happens after you fall? What happens after the fire and flames and the flying high? What happens when we finally have the come back down and walk normally again with the others? What happens when you fall out of love as quickly as you fell in? I guess, it really isn't that funny...but it's such an arbitrary entity that occurs within so many peoples lives, it's hard to not expect these things will happen to us at some point in our lives. Like I said, you don't have to actually fall out of love, but sometimes our happiness cannot be stringed along after a certain amount of time. The question then is, what are you going to do about it?
I, like many other of people in this situation, have a really huge problem with admitting to myself what it is exactly that I deserve. Many people will stay in a relationship that doesn't make them happy anymore because they don't believe that they deserve anything greater than what they have. Or like I mentioned before, to want something more than the good you already have could be perceived as being selfish; and no one in this world has ever been taught and therefore wanted to be selfish. Happiness is not selfish. Loving yourself is not selfish. And doing what you think is the best thing to do in order to achieve the greatest self-fulfilment you can in this world, is not selfish. “It's not who you are that holds you back. It's who you think you're not.” There is always going to be someone on the other-side who will be devastated with this choice, there will always be someone who gets hurt form the whiplash of your decisions. But you can't please everyone in this world. And that is one of the greatest, yet hardest things I have learnt growing up – I can't make everyone happy. But you know what I can do? I can make sure that I am happy...and then we go from there.
“See it for what it is, not for what you want it to be” For a long time, I have always found a way to manipulate the bad things in my life in order for them to appear greater than they actually are. And people say that's when you know you really love someone, when you start defending the bad things they do despite them breaking your heart. And that is so wrong. You should never, ever cross oceans for someone who wouldn't even step over a puddle for you. If you feel like you're not being treated right, then you're not. And if you don't feel like you're loved, then leave. And if you don't feel like you're happy, then do something about it and make sure that are. There are no winners or losers at the end of it all...I mean you've both won and lost. It's not about this end signifying all happiness lost, it's about all happiness beginning. So I guess, that really makes you both winners. You can't ever lose a game you enjoyed.
“In the end, only three things matter: how much you loved, how gently you lived, and how gracefully you let go of things not meant for you” - Buddha. We're human beings, and we get things wrong. And it's something we can never ever change, sometimes fate just has something a little bit different wrote down for us.
Whatever you decide to do. Make sure it makes you happy.
Go Nuts Guys.
In the past, there have been people who I have dearly loved and I would have liked to have believed they dearly loved me. But we weren't good for each other. And that doesn't necessarily mean they were a bad person or they didn't treat me in a way I felt I deserved, it just meant that they way they lived and existed within the world forced me to compromise the way I lived and existed in my world. As Daniell Koepke states, “as much as you care, you can't destroy yourself for the sake of someone else. You have to make your well-being a priority” And despite how selfish this may sound, it's actually a really important concept to be taking up and being able to apply within your life. Happiness doesn't start with what you find in someone else, it starts with how you feel inside. Now, being with someone who is challenging the way you live in life because you have to keep making these sacrifices and perhaps are constantly manipulating the way you view and live life because of their needs, isn't a healthy relationship to be in. Now, I am someone who strongly believes that you shouldn't just give up because the situation isn't great or because you haven't been able to try every element in order to fix this small hiccup, but I understand how it feels to be trapped in a love that you don't feel is driving you within life anymore. It can be extremely hard to reach a point in your life and in this potential relationship, where you feel comfortable and strong enough to be able to admit and then take action on the way you feel. Because letting go is extremely hard, but this isn't giving up or you not being in love, it's just you realising that your happiness is important and needs to be driven and kept alive by something else. Simply being just that. We're human beings...and we get these things wrong.
“Understand that people change and sometimes they're no longer compatible with our lives. We just have to learn to accept it and move on.” It's really funny actually, because sometimes we meet these amazing people who make you feel invincible and have you falling in love through the heat of the fire – and we think...this is it. This is where I am going to fall and be caught and live the rest of my life getting high off their thoughts, their love for me, my love for them. And day after day you seem to be falling further and further and nothing ever feels like it could ever be better than those everlasting moments. Then one early morning, before we ever really realise what has happened, we're laying crashed on the ground because no did ever catch us after all the time. And what happens after you fall? What happens after the fire and flames and the flying high? What happens when we finally have the come back down and walk normally again with the others? What happens when you fall out of love as quickly as you fell in? I guess, it really isn't that funny...but it's such an arbitrary entity that occurs within so many peoples lives, it's hard to not expect these things will happen to us at some point in our lives. Like I said, you don't have to actually fall out of love, but sometimes our happiness cannot be stringed along after a certain amount of time. The question then is, what are you going to do about it?
I, like many other of people in this situation, have a really huge problem with admitting to myself what it is exactly that I deserve. Many people will stay in a relationship that doesn't make them happy anymore because they don't believe that they deserve anything greater than what they have. Or like I mentioned before, to want something more than the good you already have could be perceived as being selfish; and no one in this world has ever been taught and therefore wanted to be selfish. Happiness is not selfish. Loving yourself is not selfish. And doing what you think is the best thing to do in order to achieve the greatest self-fulfilment you can in this world, is not selfish. “It's not who you are that holds you back. It's who you think you're not.” There is always going to be someone on the other-side who will be devastated with this choice, there will always be someone who gets hurt form the whiplash of your decisions. But you can't please everyone in this world. And that is one of the greatest, yet hardest things I have learnt growing up – I can't make everyone happy. But you know what I can do? I can make sure that I am happy...and then we go from there.
“See it for what it is, not for what you want it to be” For a long time, I have always found a way to manipulate the bad things in my life in order for them to appear greater than they actually are. And people say that's when you know you really love someone, when you start defending the bad things they do despite them breaking your heart. And that is so wrong. You should never, ever cross oceans for someone who wouldn't even step over a puddle for you. If you feel like you're not being treated right, then you're not. And if you don't feel like you're loved, then leave. And if you don't feel like you're happy, then do something about it and make sure that are. There are no winners or losers at the end of it all...I mean you've both won and lost. It's not about this end signifying all happiness lost, it's about all happiness beginning. So I guess, that really makes you both winners. You can't ever lose a game you enjoyed.
“In the end, only three things matter: how much you loved, how gently you lived, and how gracefully you let go of things not meant for you” - Buddha. We're human beings, and we get things wrong. And it's something we can never ever change, sometimes fate just has something a little bit different wrote down for us.
Whatever you decide to do. Make sure it makes you happy.
Go Nuts Guys.