I've always found it extremely difficult to make friends. It's not because I am shy or nervous - I am just not very good at forming a friendship with someone, I have no idea where to even start? In primary school I suppose it wasn't as bad because you're younger and when you're young nothing else in the world really matters - as long as you're happy and fighting imaginary dragons with your school friends life was pretty much perfect.
However, in secondary school things get harder, and I mean alot more harder. Finally we're introduced to these absolutely prejudiced, biased and just completely discriminatory cliques. The last thing you need when starting in a school 5 times bigger than your old, with thousands of kids including those horrendously tall year 11's (which is funny looking back to year 7 considering I am in year 11 now and haven't grown in the slightest) is to be judged on who you are and which friends you're allowed to have.
Cliques are very stereotypical - people would name the cliques from american teenage Rom-coms. There'd be your 'cool kids' your 'goths' your 'nerds' your 'pretty girl group' your 'average people that walk in the background and don't have any lines' group. To be included in one of these cliques you'd be judged on your looks, fashion, music taste, hobbies, habits...anything from the color of your hair to what you had for dinner last night. And I wasn't prepared to stand and be judged in order to have friends. I wanted someone to like me for me and everything I was, rather than liking me because everything I was happened to fit with their cliques expectations.
So, of course I would wander around on my own, dreaming for the cliques to sort of break free and everyone could be who they want to be and be friends with whoever they want, because cliques brings boundaries. Suddenly, certain people cannot talk to others depending on your status - should we have status at the age of 16? Let alone being 11 years old! But that was life back then and there was no way I could make a change, so I excepted the label I was given as I lived in my own clique called "loner."
I have been given other labels over the years, "so what are you then? Punk" and I suppose in some stereotypical american Rom-com that yeah, I'd be some of punk kid or goth. But I prefer not to stereotype myself. Why should my clothes define me as a person? Or mean I am classified as a certain label? This is probably why I struggled to make friends because everyone would belong to a label and being a stubborn as I am, I refused to give myself a name other than a human being.
Finally, 5 years later things have changed. Suddenly, people are breaking out of cliques and being with people of higher or lower status. People are friends based on personality rather than labels and it's one of the best things to have ever happened. I think we all need to learn that...friendship isn't about how popular you are or what you look like - no matter what you do or say, friendship isn't based around a clique.
I for one know this is true because I am still alone. It wouldn't matter if I was super pretty and no matter how nice I am I will always stand alone. Not because I don't belong to a clique now but because I never belonged to one in the first place. How can I break out of a clique and begin to make friends when I never really had a clique to break out of? So what I am suggesting is...maybe if we weren't so prejudiced then everyone would be able to make friends easier? Why should it matter what the grades I achieve or the clothes I wear determine who I can be friends with?
I encourage everyone to stop producing these cliques, we don't need to differentiate popular kids from shy kids or intelligent kids from those who are less capable. We just all need to open our minds to the world and realize when the power of love overcomes to love of power, the world will finally know peace.
However, in secondary school things get harder, and I mean alot more harder. Finally we're introduced to these absolutely prejudiced, biased and just completely discriminatory cliques. The last thing you need when starting in a school 5 times bigger than your old, with thousands of kids including those horrendously tall year 11's (which is funny looking back to year 7 considering I am in year 11 now and haven't grown in the slightest) is to be judged on who you are and which friends you're allowed to have.
Cliques are very stereotypical - people would name the cliques from american teenage Rom-coms. There'd be your 'cool kids' your 'goths' your 'nerds' your 'pretty girl group' your 'average people that walk in the background and don't have any lines' group. To be included in one of these cliques you'd be judged on your looks, fashion, music taste, hobbies, habits...anything from the color of your hair to what you had for dinner last night. And I wasn't prepared to stand and be judged in order to have friends. I wanted someone to like me for me and everything I was, rather than liking me because everything I was happened to fit with their cliques expectations.
So, of course I would wander around on my own, dreaming for the cliques to sort of break free and everyone could be who they want to be and be friends with whoever they want, because cliques brings boundaries. Suddenly, certain people cannot talk to others depending on your status - should we have status at the age of 16? Let alone being 11 years old! But that was life back then and there was no way I could make a change, so I excepted the label I was given as I lived in my own clique called "loner."
I have been given other labels over the years, "so what are you then? Punk" and I suppose in some stereotypical american Rom-com that yeah, I'd be some of punk kid or goth. But I prefer not to stereotype myself. Why should my clothes define me as a person? Or mean I am classified as a certain label? This is probably why I struggled to make friends because everyone would belong to a label and being a stubborn as I am, I refused to give myself a name other than a human being.
Finally, 5 years later things have changed. Suddenly, people are breaking out of cliques and being with people of higher or lower status. People are friends based on personality rather than labels and it's one of the best things to have ever happened. I think we all need to learn that...friendship isn't about how popular you are or what you look like - no matter what you do or say, friendship isn't based around a clique.
I for one know this is true because I am still alone. It wouldn't matter if I was super pretty and no matter how nice I am I will always stand alone. Not because I don't belong to a clique now but because I never belonged to one in the first place. How can I break out of a clique and begin to make friends when I never really had a clique to break out of? So what I am suggesting is...maybe if we weren't so prejudiced then everyone would be able to make friends easier? Why should it matter what the grades I achieve or the clothes I wear determine who I can be friends with?
I encourage everyone to stop producing these cliques, we don't need to differentiate popular kids from shy kids or intelligent kids from those who are less capable. We just all need to open our minds to the world and realize when the power of love overcomes to love of power, the world will finally know peace.